So I woke up around 8 am, scrolled my phone, took my meds, listened to the birds, ate an oatmeal raisin cookie, and got back into this bed. Decided to write. I’m feeling rusty with writing. But I must push myself to get these feelings up and out of me. Today I do feel a wee bit better from laying it out all in yesterday’s entry.
My room is a mess. I want to clean it up. I start moving some things and immediately get overwhelmed. I did a complete purge last year and it’s not nearly as bad as it was, but I’m starting to see the reflection of my mental and emotional state manifesting in this mess: I’m all over the place. My body physically tires out easily. I know I will feel better in a tidy space. Something is going on with me.
I’m wondering if Ketamine therapy will help. I got evaluated for OCD last year and wanted to start the treatment, but the psychiatrist wanted me to get test updates. That just prolonged everything. My back issue is the center of my life right now. I hate it. I just want to go back to being able to take a walk around the corner without having to sit down because of pain.
We will see what the acupuncture will bring.
For now, let me push a little to see how far I can get with my room.